Hafsa and Hakeem

Name: Hafsa

Child: Hakeem, 1 year old

Location: Moss Side

Expectations of Motherhood: I honestly didn’t know what to expect!

Reality of Motherhood: An emotional rollercoaster! But the best emotional rollercoaster I’ve ever been on.

Taking your child home for the first time: As I stayed in hospital overnight and felt very strange being on my own without my husband there, I was over the moon to go home but was still absolutely terrified. I was panicked at the thought of this little person relying so heavily on me. I was still in pain with every move I made which added to my worries of being able to look after my baby properly.

The best/worst advice: The best piece of advice I received was from a colleague who said, remember everything is a phase. Everything is temporary. So if your baby doesn’t sleep well, seems fussy etc, rest assured, they’ll snap out of that phase. But remember EVERYTHING is a phase. So even the good times! If your baby is an amazing sleeper don’t get complacent, it could change any day!

The hardest parts of being a mother: The heartache you get from mum guilt! The guilt you feel when you go back to work and have to leave them for the day. The guilt you feel for not putting your all into playing with them with all your energy that day because you’re just completely burnt out. Even the guilt you feel when they’re a bit constipated because you feel like maybe it’s your fault for not giving them enough water!

The best parts of being a mother: Watching my little one grow and develop. I love seeing how his personality is coming out and how he has his own little character. I also love the hugs!! There are too many amazing things to list to be honest…

Has becoming a mother changed you? Definitely. As he’s become my top priority he’s made me rejig everything else on my priority list. It’s allowed me to put things in my life into perspective and made me value time more than anything.

Has your perspective on work changed since becoming a mother? Absolutely. It’s helped me easily face tasks I once thought were daunting – I suddenly feel like superwoman! It’s made me more confident and trusting in my own abilities.

Hopes for your family: We are hoping to have child no. 2 and would like to adopt this time round! Possibly in 2/3 years time which means we probably have to start the application process pretty soon, so exciting!

What advice would you offer to new and expectant mums: Don’t be afraid to put yourself first. Self-care is so important! Naturally your baby is going to be top of your list, but at least put yourself in 2nd place. 

You don’t owe people time with your baby, these are your precious moments, own them and enjoy them!

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